Finding the Right Private School for your Child

By Karin Conrad

Teachers used to tell Holly Lombardo that her then 6-year-old daughter was a great student but she talked too much. Rather than lecture her daughter on classroom decorum, Lombardo decided she might just need more challenging work. “She would finish her work quickly and had nothing to do,” says Lombardo. 

That all changed when she enrolled her daughter at the Eliot Montessori School in Natick where children are encouraged to work at their own pace. Now, when her daughter finishes early, she creates her own independent projects. “She works on the pottery wheel or learns about Brazil,” says Lombardo, “and she feels successful every day.”

Thoughtfully assessing your child’s needs and personality is key to choosing the best private school for your child, according to Mary Mindess, education professor at Lesley University. “Wise parents match the approach to academics with the way their child learns best,” says Mindess. But understanding a school’s philosophy and how it plays out in the classroom is not always easy. “Within the philosophies there is variation. Then, you get down to the classrooms and individual teachers have their own approach,” she adds. In addition, figuring out whether your child will succeed in a particular school involves more than academics. “Parents need to look at the whole child, including social and emotional needs,” says Midge Lipkin, educational consultant and founder of Schoolsearch.

With so much to consider, parents searching for a school and educational philosophy that’s a good fit for their child need to know what to look for and what to ask. What follows are some key questions to help parents sort through what can be an overwhelming range of options.

Will the curriculum meet the needs of my child?

The first step in choosing a private school is determining what your child needs and figuring out how well a particular school meets those needs. Some kids work best with a challenging curriculum while others may require extra assistance in math, reading or other areas. Mindess cautions parents to think carefully about a school’s level of expectations: “Try to find a child who isn’t a valedictorian. Are they happy in the school or are they worried about their grades?”

Private schools often have the flexibility and low student-teacher ration to allow for a more individualized approach. “Kids here can develop according to their own timetable,” says Holly Kania, outreach and communications director at the Waldorf School in Lexington. “We can do that because we don’t have to worry about the MCAS and other standardized tests.”

At the Carroll School, a school for children with language-based learning disabilities in Lincoln, students get one-on-one instruction from a tutor for 90 minutes a day. “Tutors determine the particular strengths and weaknesses of a child and plan lessons accordingly,” says Lesley Nesbitt, Director of Admissions.

Are students taught to learn independently?

Many schools encourage students to take responsibility for their own learning and explore their passions. Mindess terms this the “inquiry” approach, based on the idea that “the child is respected as a curious intellectual being from the time they’re born.” Teachers adopting this approach aim to develop inquisitive, independent, lifelong learners.

“A huge part of our philosophy is questioning,” says Linda Silverstein, communications manager at the Rashi Jewish Day School in Newton. For a fifth grade science project, students start with a question such as, “Why are there rainbows?” or “Does listening to music help you study?” and create projects to explore the answers. 

Is the curriculum integrated? 

An integrated curriculum makes connections between subjects and organizes learning by themes. A teacher might, for example, draw on math, history, science and art in creating a unit on health or technology. Seeing how various fields intersect and influence one another in the real world can make learning more meaningful for students.

“We engage kids with an integrated approach. It’s about being able to apply their learning both inside and outside the school,” says Linda Echt, co-director of Atrium School in Watertown. A fourth-grade class at the school combined their studies of government, technology, writing and the environment as they launched a campaign to “change the margins.” Students discovered that narrowing the margins on documents led to a significant reduction in paper use and successfully persuaded the City of Boston to change the margins on city documents.

Does the school philosophy reflect my family’s values?

Children learn a great deal more than the three R’s in school: They also learn, directly or indirectly, what’s important in life, how to treat others, and whether they can make a difference in the world. Parents need to consider if a school supports what they teach their children about values. And, if faith is central to family life, they may want to choose a school founded in a particular religion.

Kathleen Culver decided to send her son Matthew, 7, to Saint Joseph, a Catholic school in Needham, partly based on the mission of the school to “educate the heart, mind and soul.” When she attended the school’s “spectacular” Nativity play, and saw her son teach his little sister to make the sign of the cross, she felt she’d made the right choice. “It warms my heart to know that someone with a similar set of values is teaching faith to my child.”

Rashi parent Cindy Janower saw the impact of the school’s emphasis on social justice and Jewish values on her children when they asked their birthday party guests to bring donations to Children’s Hospital rather than gifts. “The whole curriculum is centered on social justice. I think it’s very grounding for kids to feel like they’re part of something bigger.”

How does the school function as a community?

Any school is more than a collection of classrooms. It’s also a community of parents, students, teachers and administrators. And, once your child is enrolled, you and your family become part of the school community. “Schools are about relationships,” says Mindess. “You need to see how the teacher interacts with parents and children, parents with parents, and how children interact with each other.”

If you’re interested in a high level of involvement in your child’s school, look for a school with an “open door policy.” Many private schools are similar to the Atrium School, where parents are “welcome to visit anytime, see what’s on the walls, play a game with your child, have a cup of coffee and then go to work,” says Echt.

What impression do you get during a school visit?

Parents can and should be prepared to visit a school with a list of key questions. Once you’ve done your research, though, intuition becomes more important than a checklist when making your final decision. “If you read the philosophies, some of them use the same words, but they have a very different approach, so it’s good to visit and see what they’re actually doing,” says Lipkin.    She counsels parents to note how happy the kids look and closely observe interactions. When parents can envision their child thriving at a school, it’s a good sign their search is over.

Need help finding a private school?

Here is a list of sites offering school profiles, school locators, articles and more.

http://www.privateschoolreview.com

School profiles, state and county statistics, school locator, and relevant articles.

http://privateschool.about.com

School lists and profiles, private school blog, articles on topics such as single-sex schools, advice on getting into and paying for school

http://www.educationalconsulting.org

Member list of the Independent Educational Consultants Association

http://nces.ed.gov/

School searches, tables and figures related to education

http://www.nais.org

Information on the National Association of Independent Schools, admissions and financial aid advice

http://www.ncea.org/

Information on the National Catholic Education Association, school and Diocesan locator

http://www.peje.org/

Information on the Partnership for Excellence in Jewish Education

MA Private School Statistics

Number of Private Schools                         985

Number of students                                    157,386

Number of teachers                                    14,716

Student/Teachers Ratio             11:1 Teacher

Source: http://www.privateschoolreview.com

 
Photo caption: Tenacre Country Day School first and sixth graders work together on a project, under the direction of artist Alex Cook, to paint a mural at one of the entrances to the first grade classroom. The mural incorporates pieces of the first-grade curriculum into the design. The project was part of Tenacre's Big Friend/Little Friend program, in which first and sixth graders work together on projects throughout the year.

Karin Conrad is a freelance writer living in Waltham.