Hi, my name is Sofia and I have been training my parents for over four years. Teaching my mom and dad is a lot of work, but I have also learned tons of good stuff along the way. I feel there are many children who could benefit from my wisdom. I am here today to share some of this knowledge with kids who are in desperate need of my assistance. By following my three simple steps, you too can become the King or Queen of your castle!

Step 1: It wasn’t me.

My dad mentioned some story that I didn’t pay much attention to about a tree and some woods, but that’s not important right now. The most important thing you can remember is if they didn’t see you do it, you can blame your brother. Proceed with caution! When using this important skill to get out of unrolling toilet paper all over the bathroom floor or dropping a bowl of Cheerios on the rug, be sure the intended offender is not within your parental unit’s direct line of sight. If there is reasonable doubt you should succeed, however, if your brother is having his diaper changed at the time of the offense your plan could severely backfire.

Step 2: I am right, and you are wrong.

Adults will try and correct you from time to time. They will try and tell you some silly nonsense such as the sky is blue not green, or fire is hot not cold. I just laugh and tell them, “I am right and you are wrong.” They may try to further explain their incredibly wrong ideas and claim to have greater knowledge power just because they are older. I find that if you stick to your point and just keep telling them over and over that they are wrong, they will eventually get frustrated and drop the subject. This will leave you with one last opportunity to say, “See, I told you I was right.”

Step 3: I WAS right, and you WERE wrong.

Parents mess up A LOT. It is important to remind them when they make mistakes as often as possible. That way they will remember not to do it again in the future. I make sure I remind my mom all the time about when she forgot to send my hat and gloves to school leaving me cold on the playground. I also mention that time she forgot to send my baby pictures to school and I was the only one who did not have them for show and tell. This past week I have made a point to remind her whenever possible of that time last weekend when I said my tummy hurt in the middle of the night; she didn’t believe me and an hour later I threw up all over my bed. I TOLD HER my tummy hurt. That’s why I threw up. I was right, and she was wrong.

Another good tip: make sure you remind your brother of when your parents were wrong. He needs to know about these things too. My favorite time of day to remind him is in the morning in his bedroom when everyone else is still in bed. That way Mom and Dad can hear over the monitor as well, and be reminded all about when they were wrong. I hear this is called multi-tasking, and I am great at it.

Remember, practice makes perfect! Try working on your skills in front of the mirror. I find it very motivational. Join me next time when we discuss complex ways of framing your brother and effective methods for stalling at bedtime to help you stay up late. This is Sofia, I am four years old and I am Queen of my castle.

My daughter has put me on verbal warning. I have one week to get my act together.

Now that she is in preschool, I’ve been a getting a lot of homework assignments from Sofia’s teachers. I have to pay attention more often to the monthly newsletters that come out with special days the kids need to bring in items for show and tell, a trip to the mailbox, fieldtrip money, etc. Back in the toddler classes I used to receive multiple reminders leading up to special days that required my involvement. As my child is growing up, it would appear her teachers are expecting me to grow up as well. That one notification I received that she needs to wear black and white on a Tuesday two weeks from now; that’s the only reminder I’m going to get.

Last Friday was “Baby Picture Day”. Each child was supposed to have brought in a picture from when they were an infant. The class was then going to enjoy the morning looking at the pictures, guessing which friends they were viewing, and discussing how much their bodies have changed. I saw it on the newsletter. I even made a verbal reference to my husband that I needed to dig out a photo, grimacing to myself that most of the really good ones were on the computer. I meant to do it. Friday came and went, as did my memory of the responsibility I had for that morning.

I never heard boo from her teacher. It wasn’t until two nights ago that anything was said. Sofia approached me with, intentional or not, a well thought out guilt trip. My daughter looked me straight in the eyes with her mouth set in a perfect pout beyond her years and stated, “Mama, everyone had a picture of themselves for baby picture day. Everyone but me.”

Parent. FAIL.

All at once the memory of my “to do” came flooding back to me as I cursed under my breath. Feeling terrible that I had let her down, I stammered apologies at her and explained that I simply forgot. My next act seemed perfectly rational at the time but in hindsight has left me seriously questioning my home organizational skills. I actually asked my four year old child to tell me when I need to send something in to school for her on special class days. One might argue that I am providing my child with a solid foundation of grade school preparation, aimed at taking responsibility for her own homework. One might also argue that I’m setting a fairly poor example if I can’t remember to send a picture in on a designated day with plenty of advance notice. Is it really so difficult to post the monthly newsletter on the refrigerator, actually read it, and mark on the calendar such special days when I, the parent, am tasked with providing assistance?

Regardless she agreed to let me know, and sure enough she did it. The next day before bed she reminded me that the following day was pajama day and she needed to wear them to school. I didn’t believe her at first. I didn’t recall seeing anything about a pajama day in the newsletter. I searched through my pile of incoming mail and paperwork that is still sitting on my table just begging to be sorted, eventually found the newsletter, and marveled that she was correct. This was no surprise to her as she expressed to me in point of fact, “I was right and you were wrong.” I couldn’t argue with her there; I would have messed up again.

I need to better my game. I do not want to disappoint her again for something this simple, and I am fairly certain the next step is written warning. Knowing my child she will draw up a developmental action plan in the form of a pictogram, showing Mommy posting and reading the newsletter on the refrigerator. I expect that I will need to sign it in crayon to document my agreement to improve.

Last weekend nine high school boys from my local area apparently got bored towards the end of their February vacation, went onto the internet, learned how to go about making a chemical bomb out of a soda bottle, and then proceeded to do so.  They then allegedly drove around and placed one in a random mailbox and another in the driveway of a fellow student, which wound up under a car on that property.  They both detonated, causing considerable damage to the mailbox, and minimal damage to the underside of the car.  They were caught, they were arrested, and they now face criminal charges, the most serious of which is possession of an infernal machine which carries a sentence of up to 10 years in prison or a $1000 fine. 

The students, all of which have an otherwise clean record and many of which are 18, received a 7:30 curfew pending case review next month and face disciplinary action at school.  The boys admitted to the police that they did this, but stated that it was a practical joke with no intention of causing harm.  There is no denying that they were lucky.  The exact chemical makeup within the soda bottles has not been disclosed, however, the fact that the explosion had enough force to severely damage the mailbox is enough proof that someone could easily have gotten hurt.

Naturally the comments on the online newspapers have gone rabid.  Some take the stance these boys committed acts of terrorism, and in the face of a post 9/11 world there should be zero tolerance for their actions.  Others take the stance that these are good kids, from good families, who have never committed a previous crime.  They state that though the boys made a very bad decision no one was hurt, and while they should be held accountable they should not be sent to prison for what could have happened.

So let’s think about this.  Think back to when you were 18, or if you have teenage children consider them.  If you made this stupid, stupid mistake, would you support a maximum sentence if you or your child had committed this act?  And think about if it was your mailbox, or your car.  Would your stance be that these boys should go to prison for the destruction of your property or for the possibility that you could have been harmed?

If convicted, do these boys need to be punished?  I believe absolutely yes, they do.  Should prison be their sentence?  Will they come out better citizens, making a positive contribution to society if their college education (some of which I hear have scholarships that could be lost) is delayed, possibly even permanently?  I do not pretend to know enough about the inside walls of our correctional institutions beyond the one semester I took of criminal psychology, but I do feel I know enough to say that these boys would be drastically changed, and it will not for the better.  This one horribly misguided evening will not end their lives, but if they are sent to prison for an extended period of time, it could very well lead them to a path of further destruction.  And please let me clarify, I do not hold this opinion because they are considered otherwise “good kids from good families”; I say this for any first time teenage offender who just made the biggest mistake of his life.

I’m sure I would have a different opinion if someone was hurt, or worse if their actions had taken a life.  And I’m sure some would argue, what’s to stop the next group of kids from doing the same thing if these boys get off so lightly?  There are others who would say these are not boys.  These are 17 and 18 year olds on the brink of manhood, and it’s time to start acting like adults.  These are all valid points.  Wouldn’t it be wonderful if these boys, as part of a hefty community service requirement (and fines for the destruction of property), were to speak out in public to other teens to discuss their mistakes, how they almost lost everything, and what they have learned as a result?  I hope that the judge responsible for deciding the fate of these boys will consider not only the crime and the risk to the well being of themselves and others, but also the actual result of the damage.  Not just the destruction of property that took place, but also the future of the nine lives at stake. 

This is my opinion.  I would love to hear yours.

 There is always one common theme, one consistent sentiment that is shared with me by parents of older children when it comes to rearing little ones.  Enjoy this time. Savor these moments. Stop what you are doing and remember how they are right now; how their tiny hands curl in yours when you are walking together, how their little arms wrap around you in surprisingly tight grasps when they hug you, how they nuzzle their soft cheeks against your neck when you carry them off to bed, how their sweet voices sound when they chirp, “I love you Mama”.

There are days, there too many days when we move through the routine of our lives without even noticing that with each passing hour they are growing.  Rise, clean, dress, breakfast, lunch prep, clean, carpool, home, dinner, clean, baths, clean, bedtime, stories, sleep.  Mixed within are many silly moments together during those few hours we have before work and in the evenings before bed, but there are also so many hectic moments where I find myself scrambling them from one must-do task to the next.  How limited our time together feels.  It seems as though I blinked and my little girl is four and telling me on a daily basis that she is right and I am wrong; already so certain that she knows more about the world than I ever will.  Somewhere along the way I turned, and my two year old son found his words and began to tell me about his day.  Soon he will not be as keen to snuggle with me in our quiet mommy/son moments.  Soon like my daughter he will want to walk on his own, content to stray away from his mother’s grasp.  I did not realize until recently when he insisted on walking up the stairs to bed instead of resting heavily in my arms, how very much I am beginning to grieve the passage of time.  I did not realize until that moment how much I need to carry him, and to my dismay how it is oh so much more than he needs to be carried.  With eyes stinging and a lump in my throat, I followed behind him with arms at the ready up every cautious step. 

I have been putting off a certain rite of passage with regards to my son.  While he is quite capable drinking from a cup, I have fallen a bit behind schedule when it comes to weaning him off the bottle.  His older sister was easy.  I just stopped giving it to her and she barely batted an eye.  There was no emotional investment for her or a need to continue using it.  My son is a bit different.  He loves his “ba-ba”.  We’ve tried a few times to deny him and put his milk in a cup instead, and the result was the very few instances that he has ever thrown a tantrum.  He is one very easy going little dude, except when he is hungry and except when he wants his bottle. 

So why not push through it like we did sleep training for both children, or potty training for my daughter?  Why not stand our ground and as my husband and I jokingly refer to it, “get him off the sauce”?  He is ready. He is already biting holes in the nipples with his strong and full set of teeth.  I am sure if we stuck to our guns that within a few weeks he would accept our decision to take the bottle away.  I am sure if we can deal with the tearful protests he would get over it, and eventually even forget about it.  I know the problem is with me.  I know I am not ready for him to let go of that one last action that truly defines him as a baby. 

 I never fully understood until now what it meant when someone was referred to, like I was, as the baby of the family.  He is my last, and will never, ever stop being my baby. I can foresee many times ahead where I will struggle to let go, every step in his life taking him further and further away from my reach.  How will I handle it when I am no longer the most important person in his world?  I do not know that answer, but here’s hoping it will be therapy free for both parties.

When I shared with my younglings that we would be attending a new Feld Entertainment production of Disney On Ice for Valentine’s Day, there was a great deal of excitement around these parts.  Both kids broke into their own little happy dance accompanied by exuberant chanting of “Disney On Ice!!! Disney On Ice!!! Disney On Ice!!!”  They knew that a good time would be had by all, and they were right.

What I love about the Disney On Ice productions is that every time we go there are different themes, sightings of new and older yet endearing characters, and varying compilations of our most beloved Disney songs.  Listening to my daughter sing at the top of her lungs while waving to her favorite princesses is simply priceless.  Looking at this face, there’s no denying the joy:

In this Production of Disney On Ice: Let’s Celebrate! there were indeed visits from just about all the princesses.  It was a treat to see their newest addition Tiana, along with music from Princess and the Frog.  While my daughter may have enjoyed the princesses most, the holiday celebration that was the theme of this show brought us some interesting characters.  Alice and Wonderland, The Nightmare Before Christmas, and Toy Story all made appearances.  Of course Mickey and Minnie were the stars with their Club House friends, but we also got a taste of some rarely seen foes, including Maleficent and Cruella De Vil.  Sofia pointed and screamed out each name as they positioned themselves front and center.  My favorite scene however, was the celebration of Valentine’s Day in which the princesses skated with their partners to That’s How You Know from Enchanted.  

If you live in the Southern New England area and are looking for some family fun this February vacation, I highly recommend the show.

TD Garden – FEB. 12 – 21

SCHOOL VACATION WEEK!

Disney On Ice presents Let’s Celebrate! It’s one colossal party on ice, with all your favorite Disney friends!  Join Mickey Mouse and Minnie Mouse as they celebrate a Very Merry Unbirthday Party with Alice and the Mad Hatter; a Royal Valentine’s Day Ball with the Disney Princesses, including Cinderella, Ariel and Tiana; a Hawaiian luau with Lilo & Stitch; a winter wonderland with Woody and Buzz Lightyear from Disney/Pixar’s Toy Story; a Halloween haunt with the Disney Villains and more in a magical medley of holidays, celebrations and festivals from around the globe.  Come join the party when this spectacular ice show visits your hometown! 

A SPECIAL OFFER FOR YOU!

Purchase a 4-pack of tickets for only $44 for weekday shows, or receive $4 off weekend tickets by logging onto www.ticketmaster.com and entering the promotional code: MOM.*

TD Garden show dates:

Friday, February 12 – 7pm**

Saturday, February 13 11am and 3pm

Sunday, February 14 12NOON and 4pm

Monday, February 15 – 11am and 3pm

Tuesday, February 16 – no shows

Wednesday, February 17 – 1pm

Thursday, February 18 – 11am and 3pm

Friday, February 19 – 1pm and 7pm

Saturday, February 20 – 11am and 3pm

Sunday, February 21 – 12NOON and 4pm

*Get 4 tickets for $44 Monday-Friday matinee or $4 off weekend Friday evening – Sunday. Use promo code “MOM” at time of purchase by phone 1-800-745-3000 or visit www.ticketmaster.com.  Minimum purchase of 4 tickets required; additional tickets above 4 can be purchased at $11 each. Offer not valid on Front Row, VIP or CLUB seats. Cannot be combined with other offers. Additional service charges, facility fee, & handling fees will apply.

**Friday, February 12th 7pm performance is our Opening Night performance and all Tickets are $15 (no code required and excluding Front Row, VIP and CLUB seating)!!!

I have recently come to the realization that my four year old has the best selective hearing I have ever witnessed.

Sofia, it’s time for bed.  No response. 

Would you like carrots or green beans? Nothing.

What did you do at school today? I may receive an answer to this one if I ask several times.

But mention in passing to my husband that Disney on Ice is coming back to town in hushed murmurs, and she jumps up smiling and spouting exclamations such as, “Disney on Ice!!! Disney on Ice!!! When are we going?  In two days??? Three days???”

She doesn’t miss a trick, this one.  And I can’t resist that smile.

Feld Entertainment once again brings to Boston another performance by our most beloved Disney characters, with their presentation of Disney on Ice: Let’s Celebrate! I am very excited to provide my readers with promotional information to purchase discounted tickets.  I would also like to extend my thanks to Feld Entertainment for providing my family with tickets to the show.  We have been to several Feld Entertainment productions over the last year, and they never disappoint.  The timing also could not be more perfect, as they have performances running throughout school vacation week.  Please see details below, and enjoy the show!!!

TD Garden – FEB. 12 – 21

SCHOOL VACATION WEEK!

Disney On Ice presents Let’s Celebrate! It’s one colossal party on ice, with all your favorite Disney friends!  Join Mickey Mouse and Minnie Mouse as they celebrate a Very Merry Unbirthday Party with Alice and the Mad Hatter; a Royal Valentine’s Day Ball with the Disney Princesses, including Cinderella, Ariel and Tiana; a Hawaiian luau with Lilo & Stitch; a winter wonderland with Woody and Buzz Lightyear from Disney/Pixar’s Toy Story; a Halloween haunt with the Disney Villains and more in a magical medley of holidays, celebrations and festivals from around the globe.  Come join the party when this spectacular ice show visits your hometown! 

A SPECIAL OFFER FOR YOU!

Purchase a 4-pack of tickets for only $44 for weekday shows, or receive $4 off weekend tickets by logging onto www.ticketmaster.com and entering the promotional code: MOM.*

TD Garden show dates:

Friday, February 12 – 7pm**

Saturday, February 13 11am and 3pm

Sunday, February 14 12NOON and 4pm

Monday, February 15 – 11am and 3pm

Tuesday, February 16 – no shows

Wednesday, February 17 – 1pm

Thursday, February 18 – 11am and 3pm

Friday, February 19 – 1pm and 7pm

Saturday, February 20 – 11am and 3pm

Sunday, February 21 – 12NOON and 4pm

*Get 4 tickets for $44 Monday-Friday matinee or $4 off weekend Friday evening – Sunday. Use promo code “MOM” at time of purchase by phone 1-800-745-3000 or visit www.ticketmaster.com.  Minimum purchase of 4 tickets required; additional tickets above 4 can be purchased at $11 each. Offer not valid on Front Row, VIP or CLUB seats. Cannot be combined with other offers. Additional service charges, facility fee, & handling fees will apply.

**Friday, February 12th 7pm performance is our Opening Night performance and all Tickets are $15 (no code required and excluding Front Row, VIP and CLUB seating)!!!

“Is that your bear? What is his name?”

Sofia lifts her little stuffed animal friend to her face where they nuzzle nose to nose, a subconscious reflex she turns to whenever she is feeling shy or is seeking comfort. 

“Bear” she squeaks, her eyes peeking up over her glasses as she peers at the curious adult.

I exchange looks with the inquisitor and nod, affirming the true nature of Bear’s identity.  Her bear is called Bear.  She received him as a gift when we were still in the hospital just shortly after she was born, and they have been together ever since.  We tried to push for Bear to have a different name, only to be chastised for such an abominable suggestion.  Bear is Bear.

And thus grew a trend in our household of unoriginal names for all of our stuffed animal friends.  In addition to Bear we have Brown Bear, Little Brown Bear, Pink Bear, Graduation Bear, and the newest to be named, Bear’s Twin Brother.  Her brother’s animal friends have also benefited from this unconventional naming convention.  His favorite friend, a Dalmatian, is referred to simply as Woof-Woof. 

I credit this to the fact that he learned to say woof before he learned to say dog.  Regardless, the name stuck.  We also have additional family members by the names of Woof-Woof Junior, and Christmas Woof-Woof.

I have tried to suggest more common names, such as Edward or Jacob (sigh), but to no avail.  At this point I would even take names in the English translation of Native American descent, such as He Who Goes Where She Goes, or He Who Always Needs a Bath. Alas, no. 

This past Christmas we showed Sofia our new Elf on the Shelf.  The magic little elf, tasked with monitoring her behavior throughout the day and reporting back to Santa each night (be good…the elf is watching), was a welcome addition to our family.  We explained to her that she had the very important assignment of naming the elf, and the only rule was that he had to be named something other than Elf.  She picked…Banana.   

Yet even though she looked for Banana every morning and marveled at his ability to reposition himself throughout the house, she never gave Banana his credit; she never referred to him by name.  He was simply Elf.

When I was a child I attended a small sleep over, which instead of sleep involved over 16 hours of a mind numbing game of Monopoly.  During the throws of REM deprived real estate haggling, my friends and I discussed the names of our future children.  As I scarfed down Doritos and peanut butter at 4:00 a.m., I came to the brilliant conclusion that if I had a daughter I would name her Orchasia Keene.  Thankfully I got over it.  I am therefore trying not to be too concerned that my future grandchild, like every other doll Sofia currently owns, could eventually be named Baby. 

Let the “Nobody puts Baby in a corner” jokes commence…now.

“He who passively accepts evil is as much involved in it as he who helps perpetrate it. He who accepts evil without protesting against it is really cooperating with it.” – Martin Luther King, Jr.

As the dust began to settle in the aftermath of the hate group created among some of my peers on Facebook, a friend pointed out something I found rather ironic.  That group, wrought with malice, was created on the birthday observance of Martin Luther King, Jr.  I wondered to myself if the creator of that group understood at all why he was at home that day, enjoying a holiday.

I want to thank everyone who showed support for the woman who was targeted, as well as for the kind words that were extended to me for speaking out against the group.  There was some success.  Friends championed the cause and spread the word; many who did not even know this person did their part to try to make a difference.  The result: the creator left the group, all administrators abandoned their positions, and participation in the group dropped over 15 percent.  Those who joined forces with me rejoiced in this small victory, however it is bitter sweet.  The group is still out there; its members remain over 150 people strong.  Countless individuals have reported the group as a violation of Facebook’s terms of service, yet there is no indication of when, if ever, Facebook administrators will take action to terminate the group. 

Even though we were unable to dismantle the group, I still felt that a sense of awareness to this very important issue was spreading.  I was feeling very positive, until yesterday when I learned about Phoebe Prince.  This beautiful 15 year old girl ended her life on January 14, 2010.  While the reasoning behind her death remains under investigation, the fact that Phoebe was the victim of severe bullying has thus far been uncontested.  There are reports of public conflict between Phoebe and a group of classmates.  Prior to her death there was some disciplinary action taken towards those classmates for their behavior while attending school.  Yet it would appear most of the maltreatment didn’t take place within those walls.  The major outlets that Phoebe’s peers utilized to conduct their harassment were Facebook and text messaging. 

This horrifying example of the worst possible case scenario was exactly my point when I wrote that post.  This isn’t a child that ended her life out of no where, with everyone who knew her left to question and never understand why she did it.  There were signs.  There were so many signs.  Who reached out to help her?  Who stood up and said “this should not be happening”?  Honestly, some may have.  I do not know the details, but it was clearly not enough.  Even after her death people continued to taint her memory by bashing her on her Facebook memorial pages.  This is one poor girl in one Massachusetts town.  We are turning a blind eye if we refuse to acknowledge it is happening elsewhere.  If adults continue to reinforce this behavior through their own actions, how we can expect our children not to follow suit?

Change is needed.  Education begins at home and further structure is needed in our schools.  The State of Massachusetts is stepping up its efforts to produce anti-bullying legislation, a bill that has been put off far too long.  It is a shame that it took what happened to Phoebe for people to realize it requires prioritization.  Yet for all its worth, this bill is targeted at protecting children.  It is up to us as adults to ensure we do not allow cyber bullying to happen amongst ourselves.

Recently my daughter came home from daycare and greeted me with a little sad pout.  When I asked her what was wrong I watched her eyes swell as she explained, “Christina says that I’m not a princess. I told her that I am, but she says that no, I’m not.”  With that her face contorted in pain as she covered her eyes with her little fists and burst out with jagged sobs that tore my heart in twain.  She’s only four.  I knew the day would come when a friend, whether done with intention or not, would hurt my little girl’s feelings.  I just didn’t expect it to come so soon. 

I wasn’t the most popular kid in school.  I had friends, of course, but there were only a few individuals that I kept close to me.  In actuality I detested school.  So often I found people cruel and judgmental.  At a young age I had found myself fiercely in love, and when that love ended in an inevitable heart break, I found the world around me all the more harrowing, so often mocking me in my pain. 

Blah, blah, blah, right?  So far my story is everything ordinary.  All the painful rights of passage that one must experience throughout adolescence were present and accounted for throughout every dreadful year.   Yet there was one fateful day that showed me cruelty at its worst.  This is one of the most humiliating experiences of my childhood; I share it with you in hopes of provoking thought. 

I recall it was a sunny day outside the walls of my classroom.  I sat in the row closest to the windows paying little attention to the lecture going on before me.  I recall that I was melancholy as I watched the trees swaying in the breeze.  I cried softly while I stared out the window, doing my best to hide my face from my teacher.  The timeline for me is a little skewed so I do not recall the source of my angst at that time, but chances are it was with regards to a certain boy.  For me it was always about a certain boy.

I knew that there was snickering from the boys behind me, boys that I had been going to school with for over a decade.  I paid them little attention until one of the voices was very close to my ear.  “Jump”, he whispered.  I turned my attention now to what he was saying and realized that he was speaking to me.  “Go on, do it. Jump.  You know you want to.  Just get it over with and end it already.”  The other boys laughed at the proposal of my suggested suicide.  His taunting continued until the bell rang.  I never once turned around; I never spoke to them.  I just continued staring out the window, wishing I could disappear.

OK, for someone who was just having a bad day, negative remarks from a fool who was merely showing off to his friends is really not that big a deal.  But for a teenager whose world was crushing around her at the time, it could have been fuel for the fire.  Thankfully no, I had no desire to end my life that day.  But there are all too real stories of kids out there who would find that kind of treatment as a last straw and see it through.  That’s called bullying.  It’s very real, and it happens everywhere. 

When I first joined Facebook I was hesitant.  I wasn’t all too sure I really wanted to reconnect with people from grade school.  But I am such a different person now from who I was back then, and I was willing to bet that a lot of other people were changed as well.  I came to enjoy reconnecting with so many people.   There are some people I speak to more online now than I ever did in high school.  That’s the good part of Facebook. 

Here’s the bad:  A few days ago I caught wind of an open group on FB that was started for the soul purpose of gathering people to vent and make negative comments about an individual we went to school with whom they found annoying for reasons such as putting too much personal information on their status or commenting too often.  No matter how innocently funny some of the people who joined this group found the page to be, it’s a hate group.  I repeat it is a Hate. Group.  There is also another phrase for it, and it’s called cyber bullying.  These are adults, not children.  Never did I imagine I would see such a horrible thing among my own peers, twenty years after high school is over.

Naturally this person found out about it, as did this person’s family and friends.  It appears as though this person is strong and while hurt by the things being said will get beyond it.  But the pain, the humiliation…it breaks my heart.

The purpose of this was not to get all soap boxy, and I certainly don’t want to sensationalize it by calling personal attention to the group itself.  I am intentionally not mentioning names and ask that anyone who knows personally what I am referring to refrain from commenting with specifics.  To anyone thinking that this isn’t a big deal, this is my perspective:

If my children were older and I found out that one of them had created or joined a group as a forum for speaking ill things about another person, there is no depth to the level of disappointment I would have in my child.  If one of my children was the subject of a group created as a forum for speaking ill things about him or her, there would be no depth to the level of rage I would have for those persons who hurt my child.  I do not care how much you do not like a person. I do not care how much a person annoys you.  It’s cruel.

I am not a religious person, but I am a spiritual person.  I believe in a concept that is as old as man.  All religions have a different take on it, but the basic premise is harm none, do what ye will.  I try to live by that.  Obviously I do not always succeed.  I have been the cause of tears in others throughout the course of my life, and for that I have many regrets.  But I try to be a good person.  In general it is not a hard thing to do.  I have long forgiven those boys who snickered at me in class.  I do not believe they meant to cause me actual harm.  The little girl that hurt my daughter, it was innocent.  There was no intentional harm in her statement.  There will be a day, however, when cruel words will be said to my child, and I will be waiting to comfort her just the same as I did for that minor offense.  

While some did, I do not believe that many of the people who joined that group meant to cause harm.  But they aren’t children anymore.  These are adults setting an example for others, and in my opinion doing it poorly.  This world with so many problems will only get better if each person does their part to make it a better place.  It starts with simple acts of kindness.  Let’s be excellent to each other, people.  It’s easy if you try.

Thank you everyone for your comments and support over the last few days.  A donation has been made to Doctors Without Borders/Medicins Sans Frontieres.  The reasons why I chose this particular humanitarian organization?  This Nobel Peace Prize winning organization was established nearly 40 years ago by doctors who believe that all people have the right to medical care despite their race, religion, creed, or political affiliations.  The majority of funding for this secular non governmental organization is via private donation.  In addition to medical care to those in need, MSF has spoken out and informed the world of numerous international crises, just a few of which include the violence in Darfur, genocide in Rwanda, and the displacement of people in Ethiopia. 

Not only is MSF currently dedicating a great deal of their resources towards treating the injured in Haiti since the earthquake, they were already in Haiti.  They established offices there and have been treating the Haitian people for the past 19 years.  Although their offices and medical facilities were damaged, and a number of their staff injured, they were one of the first responders and were treating patients in make shift triages within the first few hours of the quake.  They are in the process of bringing further resources, floating hospitals, and more staff into the country.  Please take a few moments to read their website and follow more of the noble work these doctors and nurses are conducting right now, through aftershocks, all the while risking their own lives to help the people of Haiti. 

This is an organization that I believe in.  Our donations will continue to allow MSF to aid the people of Haiti and many other people throughout the world.  Thank you again for your support!  I personally feel as though I was able to do something to help those in need, and it is a wonderful feeling.

I hadn’t been feeling well the past few days and stayed home in my little unaware anti-social bubble.  It wasn’t until I saw a comment from a friend on my Facebook news feed that I learned of the devastation in Haiti.  The world has seen quite a number of terrifying disasters in recent history, but what has happened to the people of Haiti is nothing short of horrific.  By now even those who do not keep themselves abreast of current events have seen the pictures and have heard the pleas for help. 

It is so easy to look away.  With the enormity of this world it is too easy to shut yourself off and tell yourself, if it is not happening in my neighborhood, in my street, in my home, it is simply not out there.  We tell ourselves we are living in a protected world, that this sort of thing doesn’t happen to us.  But what if it did?  What kind of help would you hope for? 

I try to do what I can, when I can, but I admit that too often the extent of my aid is a silent prayer for those in need.  I’ve got a family, I’ve got a mortgage, I’ve got daycare expenses; I’ve got a budget.  I’ll also stop and buy myself a book or a cd whenever it suits my fancy.  Realistically I know that I cannot help those in need all the time, but this time around I’m going to give what I can.  I’m also enlisting you to help!

(I’ve seen this logo around a lot today, so I don’t know who gets credit. Let’s call it a friendly blogger borrow)

Today is what we call Delurker Day in the blogging community.  I’m a stat counter junkie.  I know there are a lot of you out there who read my blog and do not comment.  That’s fine, I get it, I lurk a lot on other blogs myself.  Today, however, I’m asking you all to come out.  Today I will donate $1 for every comment in the comment section of this blog post to Doctors Without Borders to directly support the efforts of MSF in Haiti.  I would love to give as much as I can, but on the off chance the word REALLY gets out there I need to put a cap on the first 100 comments, lest my husband truly have a heart attack, and I have to bank another $150 for an ER visit.  This is what I feel I can do right now.  If you are not able to donate yourself, comment in my section with your thoughts for those who are suffering right now and you can know you’ve helped.  After you comment on my blog, head on over to Modern Matriarch and comment on her post, where she also mentions several other ways you can help. She was my inspiration and the one who stirred me to do my part today.  I believe that every little bit counts.  Let’s do this little bit to help others together.

Back when I did not have children I used to get very annoyed by kids who seemed out of control in public.  I’m talking about those kids you would see running around in stores, not listening to their parents, bumping into people, screaming and crying, or even just rolling around on the ground in angst at the injustice of their imploding world; woe the denial of a desired toy or treat.  I admit that during my adult child-free existence, I blamed the parents.  Get your children under control, people!  Oh, the naivety that was me.

It takes full time exposure to young children to realize that sometimes kids from time to time will simply act totally bonkers.  That energy needs to go somewhere.  I believe it is in general a parent’s job to guide that energy so that it is acted out in the best possible manner; through exercise and appropriate play.  In the winter months of New England, however, that is not always an easy feat to accomplish. 

I worry sometimes when we go out in public that I have “Those Kids”.  You know who they are:  The ones who are unruly, all over the place, and impossible to control.  I’ve had a little experience with this at social functions.  They get so excited, or sometimes are just so plain bored, that they start running all over the place, chasing after each other, and causing general mayhem.  Here is where I, the parent, need to make certain judgment calls.  They are having a blast running around a room in circles as they squeal through laughter.  Should I choose to do so, which I usually do, I become more and more harried looking as I chase after them in efforts to stop them from collision with nearby objects, inanimate and otherwise.  I call after them, repeating their names over and over, telling them to watch out, be careful, no running, stop pushing, and my personal favorite, “YOU MUST CHILL!!!”  Sometimes it works; sometimes I fall on deaf ears.  Sometimes I wonder if I should even be bothering.  Look at them having fun! If they aren’t hurting anyone why not let them have at it?  That won’t help, however, when an eventual disaster does in fact befall them.  As a parent trying to find my way in this, I often find I walk a very thin line between reining them in and allowing them to fully enjoy their free play. 

Last week my husband and I took the kids to a little get together with our friends and their children.  Both of my kids know the home and the people in attendance very well.  There is a huge playroom for the seven younglings in attendance (all between ages two and five) to romp around to their hearts’ content.  The parents enjoy a little reprieve in the nearby kitchen where they can actually hear each other speak.  It was a wonderful afternoon, yet every now and then a select number of the kids would burst forth from the room and chase each other around the house.  This prompted a chorus of mothers to holler at the passerby’s to GET THEE BACK TO THE PLAYROOM!  Sometimes they listened, sometimes they just kept running.  But the one who kept running the most was mine.  The one who kept pushing, shoving, knocking kids out of the way, screaming in an unmistakable (and sometimes painful) outdoor voice, and running in the opposite direction of any visible parental authority the most, was MINE. 

I felt like I was constantly on her, constantly telling her to calm down, constantly ridiculing her actions.  It bothered me so much to have to do it.  They were all a little out of control, but she was overly out of control.  I tried talking to her, I tried yelling to her, I tried taking her out of the environment for a little cool down in a quiet room, but that only brought on the tantrums.  I was at a loss so I called in the big guns.  I called in Daddy.  Daddy didn’t have much luck either. 

But here’s the thing.  While I felt she was for lack of a better word being a general turd, my friends didn’t see her as being all that bad.  Yes, she wasn’t being nice at times.  Proof of that were the three smaller children she checked into walls and door frames and made cry all within a 10 minute period.  No denying she was a little crazy, “but they are all being crazy”, I was told.  One friend was ecstatic her son was finally on the receiving end of a bully-ship and was glad he was getting a taste of his own medicine.  It was later kindly suggested that I was overreacting. 

I can take that to heart.  It does make me think, was I being too hard on her?  Am I too controlling?  I also do not want to be that parent I have seen at playgroups who lets their kid run amuck, looking away while their angel is mean to other children, and ticking off the other parents whose kids have become the ill recipients of their wild one’s antics.  Yet at the same time, I do not want to be overbearing.  Where do I truly fall in this picture?  Do I inadvertently stifle in my attempts to guide proper action instead of allowing the kids to exert themselves and work out their own play relationships?  Or am I fulfilling my duty as their parent to show them the way?  Wow, it’s a very fine line; one that perhaps I will always have trouble teetering.

Host: It’s time for another episode of Say, What’s That in Your Bag?  You’re a woman of the world; a shining example of today’s modern gal.  You are a hard worker, balancing a full time job and a family. You try your best to keep up with today’s fashion, and that includes a Nine West pocketbook the size of a full grown lemur.  You’ve got your keys, wallet, pager, cell phone, Clinique lipsticks, hand sanitizer, cough drops and assorted cold medications, but wait…what’s that in your bag?  Mom et al, let’s have a closer look.

Mom et al: Well, first I have a clown nose my daughter got from the Circus.

Host: I see, and you’ve had that in your bag since the night of the show?

Mom et al: Yes, but she wears it from time to time. She just likes me to hold onto it.

Host: Sure, I can see how that would be important to have on you at all times.  You never know when you may have a clown nose emergency.  What else have you got there?

Mom et al:  Well, these are just some hair elastics.  I never know when my daughter might like me to put her hair up in a pony tail.

Host:  Yes, that’s a good point.  How many have you got in there?

Mom et al:  Five.  But they are all different colors! It is important to match her hair elastics with her outfits.

Host:  Of course, what was I thinking?  What’s next?

Mom et al:  Some mittens for my son.  They have no thumbs, they are a little small and he hates them, but he has a tendency to lose his good ones at daycare.  I like to have an extra pair on me.

Host: Now that’s what I call being prepared!  Anything else?

Mom et al:  Oh yes.  This is a bracelet my daughter got for Halloween.  It’s orange and has little ghosts and pumpkins on it.

Host:  Very cute, but Halloween was two months ago.

Mom et al: Yes, I know.  I suppose it’s possible it has been in there since her school’s Halloween party.

Host:  We may be on to something here.  It might be time to clean out that bag!  Is that all?

Mom et al:  Well, there’s a few binkies but those are nonnegotiable must haves.  I never go anywhere with my son without them.

Host:  Do you take the binkies to work?

Mom et al: Well, yes…

Host:  Moving on.  I think I see one more thing in there.  What’s that?

Mom et al:  That would be a lime green colored corvette matchbox car.  I have no idea how that got in there.

Host:  Or how long it’s been in there?

Mom et al:  Not a clue.

Host:  Well Folks, I think we’ve proven that this working mom takes a little bit of her kids with her everywhere she goes!  We’ll check back with her in a few months to see what else resides in that bottomless pit.  Join us next time for another episode of Say, What’s That in Your Bag?

I love the idea of looking back at accomplishments of the last year, and taking a moment to contemplate how far I’ve come.  This is becoming a tradition at Mom et al, one that I hope to continue for many years ahead.  Here is my quiz from last year.  I am happy to see that some things have remained constant (my weight) and others have improved (oh the joy of sleeping through the night).  Whether you blog or not, I encourage you to do this as well. 

1. What did you do in 2009 that you’d never done before? We took a vacation with our best friends and rented a house in Virginia Beach.  We were five couples with a total of 9 children between us.  The house was like a mansion right on the beach; it was so amazing.  Man, I miss the kitchen.  I could get LOST in that kitchen. 

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year? I can say for possibly the first time ever that I kept a resolution for an entire year.  I promised myself that I would reach and maintain my weight goal.  I hit it in July and have maintained it since; it was a lifestyle change of which I am very proud.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth? Yes, there were a few January babies.

4. Did anyone close to you die? We lost Grandpa this year.  He was 92 and lived a good long life.  Still, it was a tough blow for our family and we miss him.

5. What countries did you visit? HA HA HA HA HAAAA!!!! I’ve got kids. 

6. What would you like to have in 2010 that you lacked in 2009? A maid.

7. What dates from 2009 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?  Wow, it’s pretty much a blur.  Grandpa’s wake and funeral will be a time I will always remember, but I’d have to look up the exact date to tell you when that was.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?  Managing work life, which included a major change with the shut down of my office, and home life together without going completely insane.

9. What was your biggest failure? My biggest failure was my reluctance to wean my boy off his bottle. He loves it so, and I just haven’t wanted to deal with it.  That and the many times I lost my patience with an ever obstinate and independent certain little four year-old.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury? Despite retaining my title as Household Klutz, I did manage to remain injury free; for the most part.

11. What was the best thing you bought? Well, we just got ourselves a Wii for Xmas, which will be a lot of fun.  The drum set we got for our 4 year old daughter is just plain cool, and really doesn’t drive us all that batty. 

12. Whose behavior merited celebration? That award definitely goes the Boy, for FINALLY sleeping through the night on a regular basis.  Thanks, Little Man.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed? I have a feeling a lot of bloggers who fill out this survey will have the same answer:  Balloon Boy’s parents.  Man did that tick me off, not only for wasting tax payer money and resources, but also for keeping me glued to the TV in agony at the thought of a young boy alone, thousands of feet up in the air, falling from sky to his death.  While I’m at it, there was also that Mommy Blogger that created an outrage by faking a story and posting on her blog and Twitter that the TSA took her son from her during a security check. 

14. Where did most of your money go? The same as last year…day-care.   That won’t change any time soon.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about? Verizon FIOS finally came to our area.  Yay!!!

16. What song will always remind you of 2009? Probably that Romeo and Juliet song… is that by, Taylor Swift?  I choose this only because when I was on the Virginia Beach trip and went food shopping with the girls, I was the only one in the car who had never heard the song.  My Girlfriends knew every word.  I think I’m stuck in the 70s/80s/90s.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:

a) happier or sadder? Happier

b) thinner or fatter? Thinner

c) richer or poorer? Richer from a life perspective, but if we’re talking about finances, then I’m definitely poorer.  We need to stop asking this question right after Xmas.

18. What do you wish you’d done more of? Exercise. I’m still fairly fit, but I need to make more time for me.

19. What do you wish you’d done less of? Stress.  I need to find my Chi again.

20. How did you spend Christmas? Christmas Eve was spent with my husband’s father at my sister in law’s, Christmas Day was spent at home with my dad’s side of the family, the Saturday after Christmas we took the kids to see Disney on Ice, and the Sunday after Christmas we went back to my sister in law’s to exchange gifts with my mother in law. I’m still exhausted.

21. Did you fall in love in 2009? Yes, I never thought it would happen, but I think from a movie perspective I’m Team Jacob.  (YES I KNOW, he’s only 17)

22. What was your favorite TV program? Dexter.  Hands down best show on TV, and it was an AWESOME season.

23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year? No. My daughter used the word ‘hate’ towards an object recently, and it really bothered me.  It’s an ugly word, and I try never to hate.

24. What was the best book you read? If I got my act together I would have finished The Lost Symbol by now and perhaps I could report that it is the best book I have read this year, but alas I am still trying to get through it.  Instead I will choose Breaking Dawn.

25. What was your greatest musical discovery? That “I’ll be there” by the Jackson 5 transcends many generations.  My kids stop what they are doing every time that State Farm commercial comes on TV to sing along.  Listening to my daughter sing, “Where there is love, I’ll be there” swells my heart to burst every time.

26. What did you want and get? The Wii Fit!!!

27. What did you want and not get? A raise, but considering I survived three layoffs last year, I’ll just keep my mouth shut.

28. What was your favorite film of this year? Star Trek.  WOW, what an awesome movie.

29. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you? I turned 36 and I remember it as being one of the worst birthdays I have had in a long time.  Total suckage, although I do think there was cake.  I have much hope for 37.

30. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying? A maid.

31. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2008? Actually I was a little better this year on the fashion train.  I finally replaced the old baggy clothes I was wearing from before my weight loss, and made friends with Ann Taylor again.  Just call me Business Casual.

32. What kept you sane? Blogging, Facebook, Twitter, and my Husband.  Not necessarily in that order.

33. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most? I still adore Michael Shanks, still miss James Marsters as Spike, continue to mourn Heath Ledger, and finally came out as a fan of Jim Cantore.  He’s my favorite Winter Weather Expert.

34. What political issue stirred you the most? I never talk politics.

35. Who did you miss? I still miss my friend Paul, I don’t think that will every change. I miss several coworkers that were let go this past year. It’s strange and sad when your work family is no longer with you every day, especially when it is not their choice to go.

36. Who was the best new person you met? There are a few very nice families that I met at Parent Group, but other then that I haven’t really met anyone new.

37. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2009.

• Parenting is still really, really, really hard sometimes, but mixed with a whole boatload of awesome moments.  It’s important to take stock, and remember the awesome.
• If you’ve got a mystery smell in your car, and you’ve checked everywhere for the location of that elusive bottle you think is hiding under a seat…check the car seat upholstery, because your two year old might just think it’s fun to tip the bottle upside down so it can drip, drip, drip on the fabric when you are not looking.
• If you are cheesy on-line video game obsessed, and stuck on level 21 of Fitz for the past 6 months, apparently if you Google the phrase, “Is it possible to get past level 21 of Fitz” you will not only find MANY people as crazy obsessed as you who are also stuck on level 21, you will also find a rare privileged few who made it to level 27, and are now stuck.

38. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.

I had a really hard time with a song lyric this year. So I think I have to go with an oldie.  By my own unintentional design, and at the unfailing request from my ABBA obsessed daughter, I have listened to this song just about every day for the past 3 months, lest ALL HELL BREAK LOOSE for that 10 minute ride to day-care.

I have a dream, a song to sing

To help me cope with anything

If you see the wonder of a fairy tale

You can take the future, even if you fail

I believe in angels

Something good in everything I see

I believe in angels

When I know the time is right for me

I’ll cross the stream, I have a dream.

On behalf of myself and my family, I wish you a very Happy New Year.  May 2010 be filled with joy, and wonder.

This past month has been a difficult sea of movement for me, at times a torrent of waking hours followed by minuscule passages of fitful sleep.  How I got through it all, it would seem, is simply by the fact that time marches forward.  It may not feel simple as it is passing, but pass it does none the less.  The countdown to Christmas in addition to the general buzz of the holidays (cleaning, food shopping, baking, present buying, cleaning, wrapping, holiday parties, more cleaning) was coupled by a fairly immense amount of pressure to complete Workplace deadlines that brought me right up to the final ours before Christmas Eve.  This was the last big hurtle that the shutdown of our office presented, and although I will still deal with some residual affects in the months to come, what we successfully accomplished in the last month is nothing short of mind boggling.

While yes, all that was much to handle, I’ve been stomaching a much deeper fret.  The sleep patterns of my four year old had become a great concern, one that finally came to a head last week with a call to our family doctor.  A call I was frankly scared to make.  An answer I was too afraid to hear.

Around the time of Halloween, and shortly there after we started dealing with the “people” in Sofia’s bedroom.  These people were later clarified as pictures, dreams, or better stated, negative images born from a blossoming imagination.  The issue of the nighttime visitors, however, progressed from tears from my little one before bedtime, to a Nightmare on Elm Street style refusal to sleep, to waking with nightmares in the wee hours of the morning.  It is no exaggeration when I state that my little girl was padding to my bedside between the hours of 3:00 and 5:00 a.m. on a nightly basis for a month straight with tears in her eyes seeking comfort from her latest bad dream.  Yet it seemed that no comfort I could provide her was enough to make it stop. As the two of us lost more and more sleep from day to day, the situation became all the more desperate.

Just a few examples of the dreams: there have been bugs trying to bite her, friends not sharing their toys during outside play, and a really strange one with Elmo at sea in a thunderstorm with a bug swimming nearby.  We discussed each dream.  She understood that they were not real.  She accepted that they were just pictures and images.  I suggested to her that she try not to think about them anymore, and to focus on things that make her happy.  She claimed that she does try to do so, and with all the rationality of someone beyond her years, continued to explain to that choosing not think about them does not stop the dreams from coming once she falls asleep.

I’ve done the research.  These are not night tremors. She is not waking from sleep screaming or unaware of what is happening.  She can describe to me in great detail and clarity each nightmare she has immediately following each incident and for many, many days later.  While doctors agree that it is not uncommon for children her age to have nightmares during this period of development, the frequency of the incidents became alarming. 

There were no major changes in her life these past few months.  There was no alteration to her routine.  In general her days have been happy.  Our daycare has had nothing of concern to report.  So of course, as her mother I looked inward.  The major changes have been with me.  Who is the one who has been under an enormous amount of stress lately?  You betcha…me, me, and more me. 

I didn’t think I was exposing them to my current state of mind.  My boy had been acting fine.  She is an intuitive little girl, however, so it’s entirely possible my stress was rubbing off on her.  When I spoke to her doctor words such as anxiety disorder, and early stages of OCD were thrown about.  Really?  In a four year old?  MY four year old?  It just shouldn’t be so, and in that case I would much prefer the problem to be because of me.  The doctor and I tossed around ideas of books Sofia and I could read together to deal with the nighttime fears, discussions we could have together, and even the suggestion of a dream catcher which she may embrace given her vivid imagination. 

But what if the dream catcher didn’t work?  What if the books just scared her more?  What if I said all the wrong things and only made the situation worse?

Just as I was preparing to have the big talk, however, I began to notice a change.  The last few nights before Christmas when I found her in my room her level of distress didn’t quite seem so sincere.  I began to question if the action of waking from the nightmares was actually forming a pattern or routine.  Was she just becoming used to waking during that time, and coming to find me knowing that I would comfort her?  I do not doubt that there were times when she was genuinely afraid, but I found myself questioning, to what degree?

The night before Christmas Eve I had a talk with her.  I explained to her that everyone has bad dreams some times, even mommies.  I explained to her what I do when I have a bad dream: take a few deep breaths and think about people I love and things that make me happy before closing my eyes to go back to sleep.  I reminded her that if she is really scared and needs help she can come to me, but that maybe not every dream is so bad that she needs my help.  Perhaps she could see how she feels, and try to go back to sleep on her own.

It was with our doctor’s support, and with great trepidation that I suggested this.  I did not want to leave her with the impression that she could not come to me, but I also want her to become self actualized and strong, and to learn to believe in her own power.  I thought the chat went well, and she said that she would give it a try.

Was it the talk?  Was it the fact that my work stress for the most part has passed?  Was it the excitement of the holidays?  I’m not sure, but she has not come to my bedroom since.  I have some concern with the fact that she is stating she is not having bad dreams, as opposed to the acknowledgement that she had one and dealt with it.

It has been just short of a week but we are both finally getting some solid sleep.  Are we in the clear?  Has this stage of development passed?  Did I do the right thing?  I’m not counting my chickens yet, or my sheep for that matter.  Only time will tell.

Christmas just kept on coming for the Mom et al household this year.  After the fun festivities of Christmas, the long awaited day to attend Disney on Ice Presents 100 Years of Magic at the TD Garden in Boston had finally arrived.  The kids were donned in their favorite Disney character t-shirts of course, and could not stop talking about their excitement to see Mickey Mouse, all of their favorite Princesses, and The Incredibles!  I’m happy to report that Feld Entertainment did not disappoint.

Mickey Mouse, along side Minnie, was the Master of Ceremonies.  Even above the roar of the crowd I could still hear my little ones screaming his name in glee.  In addition to our favorite Mickey Mouse Club characters, just about every princess (the only one I don’t remember seeing was Aurora), and the much anticipated Incredible Family, the characters from Aladdin, Nemo, Toy Story, and Pinocchio all made appearances.

My favorite by far, however, was a short story of Mulan, which is in my opinion the best and most underrated Disney story.  In addition to a narration of the story, several of the best songs from the movie were performed.  The families in my section received an added bonus as my 4 year old daughter belted out “Reflection” and “I’ll Make a Man Out of You” at the top of her lungs.  Thankfully, they didn’t seem to mind as they were subjected to my 2 year old son screaming “WOW!” rather repeatedly throughout the entirety of the show. 

There are still two days left to attend the show, and tickets are available through Ticket Master.  If you are looking for something to do this vacation week, I highly recommend the show, a joy for the entire family.  Included below is a promotion for discounted tickets to the show.  Thank you Mom Central for such a rewarding experience.

What was that? Was that a scream? What time is it? 4:00 a.m. Ugh.

GASP!

There it is again! That’s Sofia. That is not a normal cry, not at all. My God, is she hurt? Fall out of bed? Bad dream? Bleeding? Abduction? Did we lock the doors? There it is again. Baby, I’m coming!

Jump out of bed.

Oops, that pillow landed on Tony. He won’t notice.

Trip.

Ouch! Damn slipper.

Stub foot.

Ouch! Wretched door.

Storm into child’s room; child is sitting up in bed, wide-eyed, mouth slightly agape.

Sofia, are you OK? Did you have a bad dream?

Child pouts and shakes head no.

Are you hurt? Do you not feel well?

Child scrunches face into a deeper pout and shakes head no.

What is wrong then?

Child sobs a response only her mother could interpret.

Oh. You lost your hair elastic? Yes, I see that. It’s right there next to you on your pillow. Would you like me to put your hair back into a pony tail for you? Ok, then. Are you all set now? Get some sleep.

Stumble back to bed; attempt to breathe deep in order to reverse the organ flip of heart and stomach that feel twisted within the torso beyond repair.

Make a mental note to warn child of impending doom should she ever give her mother a scare like that again.

Listen to husband’s peaceful snoring in a failed attempt to lose consciousness, and just as a fog starts to set over a slowly quieting brain, curse the heavens for the cries that suddenly invade from the OTHER child’s bedroom.

When I confirmed that I would be partnering again with Mom Central to promote the next Feld Entertainment show that is coming to our area, I made one teeny tiny mistake.  I told my daughter that we are going to see the show a full three weeks before our opening night tickets.  That would be three weeks very long weeks I have ahead of me of non stop excitement, and requests for finite details of a show that has my daughter beside herself with glee.  It’s all good; I am very excited as well.  Thank you to the fine folks at Mom Central for sending my family free tickets to the show.

I do not believe there is a child anywhere in the Boston/Providence area (OK, plenty of adults too) who would not go head-over-heels gaga to go see Disney on Ice presents 100 Years of Magic.  For my four year old, this is a dream come true.  Given that the show is coming to town right after Holidays, Christmas for this little girl will just keep on going.  The promise of seeing Mickey, Minnie, and her favorite princesses is sure to bring many a night of sweet dreams to come.

While I am psyched for my family, I am equally thrilled for one of my lucky readers.  Mom Central is providing me with a family four pack of tickets to give away!  I therefore am proud to announce my second giveaway contest. 

Disney on Ice

100 Years of Magic

Date:    Saturday, December 26, 2009

Time:    7:00 PM

Where: TD Garden, Boston

Contest Rules:

The winner must live within 100 miles of Boston.

To enter, submit a comment on this post and tell me who your children’s favorite Disney characters are. 

The contest will run through 5:00 PM on Friday, December 11, 2009.  The winner will be contacted via email for instruction on how the tickets will be received.

Bonus Entries (please post a separate comment for each bonus entry with a link if applicable):

1. Subscribe via email.
2. Join my site via Google Friend Connect.
3. Follow my blog via Networked Blogs (Facebook account required).
4. Post a link to this giveaway on Twitter.  Post a comment with your Twitter account profile, i.e. http://twitter.com/Mom_et_al.
5. Submit a blog post about this giveaway with a link to the post, http://mom-et-al.com/2009/12/giveaway-contest-disney-on-ice.  Post a comment with the link to your post.

The winner will be selected via an online random generator.  Your number assignment will be your comment number, so be sure to enter a comment for each individual bonus entry.

Good Luck!  Even if you don’t win the contest, fear not! I also have a promotional offer to share with you through Ticketmaster for discount tickets to the show.  Click on the link below to open the PDF file (free Adobe Reader here) or the image to open the jpg file.

Disney on Ice presents 100 Years of Magic:

I started off writing an entertaining little ditty about the little things in life that I appreciate, like my dishwasher, pacifiers, and Chap Stick.  After spending Thanksgiving Day with my family, and realizing just what an amazing life I have, I ditched it and started over.  Here is what defines my life.  Here is where my happiness lies.  Here, are my thanks.

My husband is my rock.  He has been my best friend for 13 years, and sometimes he knows me better than I know myself.  He loves me for all that I am (including clumsy) and stands by me even when I am a bonehead.  He builds me up when I do not have enough confidence, calls me out on my shit when I am wrong, and forgives my indiscretions (I steal covers) which happen more than I like to admit.  We take each other with love, flaws and all, and for that I am ever thankful.

My daughter; I do not know how to begin to describe the wonder and amazement that this child has brought to my existence.  Our days are filled with laughter and song.  She has the world at her feet and she relishes the discovery.  She is observant, thoughtful, sweet, vibrant, startlingly clever, my pride and joy.  Life before she entered this world was simply not as bright.

My son, my darling boy; my heart spills with the knowledge that this adorable little person is mine.  He has the sweetest soul.  At the young age of two he is already so giving and kind hearted.  When he hugs me he wraps his tiny arms around my neck and squeezes ever so tightly, as though he never wants to let go.  His easy going nature shines through as he romps through his day, following his sister, gabbing away while he plays.  He pauses to make sure I am watching and gives me a smile that lights up his entire face.  That one little smile can make any wrong in my day melt away in an instant.  His first talent to emerge is the ability to make others happy, just by being near him.

There has been a lot of stress in my life lately.  Changes on the job front, general financial concern, worry over the health of my family, and the recent loss of a loved one has been rattling around in my brain for the better part of the last six months.  All these things have left me feeling overwhelmed, mostly due to what little control I have over each situation.  I could wallow in these stressors, sink deep into fear of the unknown, or I could reread my last three paragraphs and take stock in what I have.  I have a loving family.  We have a beautiful home.  My husband and I for the foreseeable future have stable employment.  We want for nothing.  My children are happy and healthy.  We are all happy and healthy.  I want to remember this the next time I feel my life spinning, and remain thankful for what I have; a wonderful life with everyone I need by my side.